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Song Parodies -> "Shite"

Original Song Title:

"Shine"

Original Performer:

Take That

Parody Song Title:

"Shite"

Parody Written by:

Wendy Christopher

The Lyrics

To anyone in the UK, the original song conjures up just one thing in their mind.... a certain supermarket chain that's kind of adopted it as their own personal signature tune. And that's where the inspiration for this parody came from; I've often wondered if little Gary Barlow sits alone in a room sometimes and thinks "Geez, why the heck did I let them do that?" Was the money really worth it, Gary? (A further note: there are two ways to use the UK slang word 'shite': one is in the context of a collective noun, i.e. 'stuff', and the other is as a tame version of the word... well, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to work that out, does it? I am of course using it in the former context in this parody, in the interests of Not Being Sued.)
Once, I wrote a real catchy song
And everybody sang along
‘Cos it stuck in their head, and it went straight to the top
An advertising agency
Wondered if it was alright with me
To use my song in an ad
I guess I didn’t stop, stop, stop…

To really think about what I had done
And so I sold it on, yes I sold it on…… oh ho…

Oh come on, yeah it’s wrong, but that song
Is a goldmine going strong
You’d do it too you know I’m right, dead right
And they said
Use your head, you’ll get paid
Lots of bread to sell our shite….. sell our shite!

Not such a great song anymore
It tells you “hit the store
And buy some groceries
‘Cos it’s BOGOF* on the beer”
And now they’re getting clearer to me
The images that people see
A supermarket hall, with that bloke off Top Gear, oh dear…

I wish I’d known before what I know now
Undo it all somehow, wish that I knew how….. oh ho…

What a con, Morriss-ons, led me on
Credibility has gone
Sold with that ditty’s copyright, that’s right
So confused, should’ve choosed to refuse
Now it’s used for sellin’ shite….. sellin’ shite!

Once used to move you
Soulful like songs ought to be
Now it just proves you
Watch all the ads on tv!

That refrain, not again
I can hear you all complain
It’s on all morning, noon and night, alright
I admit, I’m a tit, used a hit
Just to sell a bit of shite… sell some shite!

Chart topping single
Me at my musical peak
Now it’s a jingle
Muzak to shop to each week!

I can’t deny it
Now it’s an anthem to greed
You’ll want to buy it -
Shite that you don’t really need!
* Acronym used in the retail industry for Buy One, Get One Free. The official video for TOS can be found here.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

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User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - February 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Wendy - Skillful as always and thought-provoking. In the much more crassly commercial culture of the U.S., the usage of songs in sales is often a pathway to artistic success. But some of us can still cringe...Greig for a cell phone commercial, Beethoven used to sell cars, etc. If they'd only use our parodies instead! (LOL!) ;D
Andy Primus - February 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Good to see a fellow Brit posting parodies here! Very well written & rhymed, although I didn't Youtube the OS to go along with it - I can't stand them (I don't seem to like much outside of 50's - 70's music). LOL @ the BOGOF verse.
Tommy Turtle - February 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Surely can't fully appreciate, being US-ian, but your skill with words is quite evident. 555.

btw, Over Here, "BOGO" is the acronym, 'cuz we r 2 laZ 2 typ 5 ltrs. ... also, the use of "s***e" -- this writer did "Shi'ite Christmas" to "White Christmes", bewailing the Iraq situation,, but no plug-link. ('m sure you could find it, had you nothing better to do -- poor thing!;)

Line: "Man full of Shi'ite" in parody of Ahmadinejad, too .     Don't be bashful; John A. Barry and many others have used "s***e" where, uh, "appropriate", if that's possible. (It's nicer than the four-letter version. ;-D )

Strange -- the comment filter is auto-asterisking your word, even though it's used in parodies often enough.
Tommy Turtle The Movie - February 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Wendy, thanks for reading and commenting on the turtle's older parodies. Replied at each, and please ignore the ridiculous and shameless plugs there -- it's just that I DK how our paths haven't crossed in the 3+ years you've been here, and it was quite a treat to discover one so talented (and appreciative! ;)
        Given time, I intend to peruse your catalog as well. Was going to take a break after today's efforts, as the terrible annual paperwork of the US Income Tax looms large, but I *will* get to them! Cheers!
Wendy Christopher - February 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks for all the lovely comments, everyone!
ribber, I know exactly what you mean - many a song I once loved has been ruined for me once they used it in an ad!
Tommy, I'm so glad you said that the comment filter auto-asterisks, I feel so much better now! I've had it happen before in comments people have written for previous parodies, and I just thought "Oh heck, they're being all polite.... whereas I just typed those words in my parodies with not a care! That's it - I'm officially a fishwife!"
Andy - hello, fellow Brit! ;^) I don't blame you for not YouTubing it; I don't mind most of their other post-2000 songs, but I never did really rate this one either!

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