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Song Parodies -> "The Man"

Original Song Title:

"Man"

Original Performer:

Original Broadway Cast of 'The Full Monty'

Parody Song Title:

"The Man"

Parody Written by:

The Comedian

The Lyrics

On November 18 and 19 of 2005, I will be playing the part of "Marshall Brown" in The Nashoba Players' new dinner theatre production, "The Award Show". At the request of the director, I've been "commissioned" to write some parodies of show-tunes that we will use in this upcoming performance of "The Award Show". This particular parody will be sung by the character "Chad Fontaine", a young, handsome, egotistical actor, after he wins one of the coveted "Artty Awards".
I'll get more work, my star is shinin'
They called me jerk, now they'll be whinin'
They'll never stop my upward-climbin'
'Cause I'm The ... Man!

My handsome stuff's there in the mirror
I'm ripped and buff, complexion's clearer
Girls fight to get up-close and nearer
I'm an award-winning, god-like man!

And when a scene I'm in comes on your T-V
You'll faint and swoon whenever you see me!

I'm the man, and here's my bonus [holds up Artty Award]
Now when I'm swinging my cojones
I'll show 'em what testosterone is
'Cause I'm The
Star-studded
Hard-pudded
Groupie-grazing MAN!

***[skipping the Dave-Jerry conversation in the original song]***

Line up, ladies!
Here comes Fontaine --- The Big Kahuna ---
Come take a number --- it's raining ME !

Kneel down, ladies!
It's your God-of-Love Chad, throwing his thunderbolt into your love-zone!
Bow down! Smooch my Gucci shoe!

Fully-loaded --- I'm Chad-Apollo --- your newest, and, BIGGEST star!
M-m-mount my "Mount Olympus", baby! HOO-YAAHH !!!

I'm gonna jump straight up
Kick a hole in the moon
I know exactly where I'm going
And I know I'm gonna get there soon
I've shown you, I've shown them all
I've shown them all the real thing

Who is The Man?
Why does it matter?
'Cause I'M THE MAN --- WORSHIP AND FLATTER !!
Give me your LOVE
Give me your WIFE

'Cause I am ---
'Cause I am the ---
The Man!
The REAL Man!
Yes I am!
In the mo-vies!
And on T-V !

The REAL Man you've been missin'
Who the ladies will be kissin'
I'M THE RAM-ROD
BOD-OF-GOD
MAN !!!
"The Man" COPYRIGHT 2005 John D. Small

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   5
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 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Royce Miller - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
Congratulations on your writing success. I love anything to do with the Full Monty. It was such a well-done movie, I didn't see the broadway show. The characters in the movie were very memorable, very believable.
John Barry - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
You, sir, should be wriiting musicals. This is excellent.
alvin rhodes - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
YOU da man...5s
Rick C - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
I'll second what Mr. Barry said. 555
Johnny D - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, Royce, JB, alvin, and Rick!
Larry Hensley - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
Kinda funny
Johnny D - September 23, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Larry.
Adagio - September 24, 2005 - Report this comment
Fabulous, even though I don't know the music! I know your pacing. 5's
Johnny D - September 28, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Adagio!

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