My thighs, my thighs,
Feel like mourning 'cause of thighs,
'Cause my legs are like two big, fat towers.

My thighs, my thighs,
They both tremble when I try,
To walk, so I just don't anymore.

And I say,
Ew, ew, ew, ew.
Ew, ew, ew, ew.
Boo hoo.

My thighs, my thighs,
They are bigger than the skies,
And they jiggle like that jello mold.

My thighs, my thighs,
When I see them I could cry,
They are huge montrosities, oh yes.

And now, that I,
Have tried to walk around,
Oh, yeah yeah,
I have fallen down,
'Cause my meaty legs,
Did bring me down.

Ew, ew, ew yeah yeah,
And I said ew, ew, ew ew yeah yeah.

Ew, ew, ew, ew...
Boo hoo.