Ladies and gentlemen
This is Marlon number 5

One, two, three, four, five
Everybody in the house, hey come on let's jive
To the "Guys and Dolls" soundtrack
Where he was still a little hot
But I really don't wanna
Watch "Last Tango" like I did last week
I had to look at his butt cheeks
He ate meatballs, pasta, burgers, and pizza
And as I continue he's eating more meat-a

So what can I do? I really beg you, my Lord
I have no idea what we're doing this for
Maybe if he was any good looking, I'd jump him
Now someone play the damn trumpet

A little bit of "Stelllaaaaa!" in my life
A little bit of wifebeater by my side
A little bit of skinny's all I need
But the gross and fat one is all I see
A little bit nutty, he's the one
A little bit crazy, all along
And if it was any other man
He'd never get away with that life plan

Marlon number 5 !

Waddle up and down go and move it all around
Shake your head to the sound
And don't fall on the ground
A donut to the left, a donut to the right
Fried chicken in the front and French fries to the side
Clap your hands once and clap your hands twice
And if you act like him, well something ain't right

A little bit of "Stelllaaaaa!" in my life
A little bit of wifebeater by my side
A little bit of skinny's all I need
But the gross and fat one is all I see
A little bit nutty, he's the one
A little bit crazy, all along
And if it was any other man
He'd never get away with that life plan

Trumpet !
The trumpet !
Marlon number 5 !
(heh heh heh ha)

A little bit of "Stelllaaaaa!" in my life
A little bit of wifebeater by my side
A little bit of skinny's all I need
But the gross and fat one is all I see
A little bit nutty, he's the one
A little bit crazy, all along
And if it was any other man
He'd never get away with that life plan

I would love to
Ask him "What the hell's wrong with you?"
'Cause he can't run and he can't hide
It sticks out, that big fat behind

Marlon number 5 !