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Song Parodies -> "Chuck Norris Vs. Brian Peppers Vs. Helen Keller"

Original Song Title:

"The Ultimate Showdown"

Original Performer:

Lemon Demon

Parody Song Title:

"Chuck Norris Vs. Brian Peppers Vs. Helen Keller"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

One day Chuck Norris took a little stroll
Didn’t really know he was getting watched by a troll
Brian Peppers
Who picked up a poll
Chased his ass down the street hollering
What now ho?!
Chuck who insanely didn’t give a f*ck
Did a round house kick
That would self-inflict
Pain to a midgets d*ck
He ran away and slammed flat into Helen Keller
Def and blind yall ain’t gotta teller
She fell to the ground and begin to sing
It sounded like a gay sound from Disney’s “Aqua Marine”
Brian Peppers continued to chase Chuck with a trampoline
Jumped on his back and let out a mad scream
That would doubtfully put old Chuck in his place
That’s when Chuck did a little somethin for the human race
He turned around hollering bye yo
And kicked his little midget ass back to Ohio
The clouds were high the sun begin dwellin
Now all Chucks gotta do is take out Helen
Chuck rammed himself back in all of his rage
And tripped over Helens movie “Around the Block In 80 Days”
Then Helen picked up her little blind stick
And hit Chuck Norris right in the d*ck
Chuck was screamin WHAT THE HELL!!!???
About that time Brian Peppers was out on bail
He came back to Texas runnin his midget mouth
Helen drawled back and punched him in the (OUCH!!!)
Chuck Norris jumped up so fast he looked like a stranger
And gave em a little taste of “Walker, Texas Ranger”
Helens blind ass splashed ever higher
And Brian ran away with his ass on fire
Which caught flames on Chucks ford ranger
That was parked by a little bar called the re-arranger
But don’t worry Chuck is never in any real danger
So Chuck returned to where Brian’s little body was last spotted
He was barely movin and his ass was rotted
But Brian had just one more trick
Brian reared back and pulled out his d*ck
And Brian spoke
What the F*ck!!!!????
Get ready to suck!
I got nothin to lose I’m almost dead Chuck
Chuck didn’t really take it as a threat
And that’s when Helen opened her mouth and said…oh yeah..haha…she can’t talk
Helen started crawling closer
that’s when Brian pulled a gun out of his pants called the de-composer
He shot it at Chuck hopin it would put him in his place
But that place don’t exist so it went in Helen’s face
It blew her blind ass into another dimension
Man that’s a pretty damn good distance
So Chuck ran straight at Brian
And sent his little short midget ass flyin
Man that sh*t was the coolest
Well time is up and the battle was won at the goriest
As Chuck watched Brian explode somewhere deep in the forest
The winner of the battle was none other than Chuck Norris
I kind of went out of my way of the second parody album to make this one! Hope ya like it!!!

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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 2.3
Overall Rating: 2.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   1

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