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Song Parodies -> "The Closest Point With Turkey"
Original Song Title:
"The Closest Thing To Crazy"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Katie Melua
Parody Song Title:
"The Closest Point With Turkey"
Parody Written by:
Jack Rudd
The Lyrics
A comment on how difficult it is to win with Turkey in the game of Diplomacy
How can I think I'm going strong
Yet hit a wall around St. Pete?
How can winning plans go so wrong?
How can draws feel so like defeat?
How can I grow so steadily
Then stop my growth needing so few?
How is it France and Germany
Make sure my pieces can't get through?
This is the closest point with Turkey I have ever been
Going for a win, stuck on seventeen
This is the nearest point with Turkey I have ever known
I can't win with Turkey on my own
And now I know that these two things are linked for sure
Playing with the yellow bits
And settling for a draw
Was there some point I had a win
Or was it all inside my head?
It's so easy to guard Berlin
It's so easy to block the Med
How can you two co-ordinate
To block all routes for my attack?
Why is this line a stalemate?
Why is the North all blue and black?
This is the closest point with Turkey I have ever been
Going for a win, stuck on seventeen
This is the nearest point with Turkey I have ever known
I can't win with Turkey on my own
And now I know that these two things are linked for sure
Playing with the yellow bits
And settling for a draw
And settling for a draw
And settling for a draw
Yet hit a wall around St. Pete?
How can winning plans go so wrong?
How can draws feel so like defeat?
How can I grow so steadily
Then stop my growth needing so few?
How is it France and Germany
Make sure my pieces can't get through?
This is the closest point with Turkey I have ever been
Going for a win, stuck on seventeen
This is the nearest point with Turkey I have ever known
I can't win with Turkey on my own
And now I know that these two things are linked for sure
Playing with the yellow bits
And settling for a draw
Was there some point I had a win
Or was it all inside my head?
It's so easy to guard Berlin
It's so easy to block the Med
How can you two co-ordinate
To block all routes for my attack?
Why is this line a stalemate?
Why is the North all blue and black?
This is the closest point with Turkey I have ever been
Going for a win, stuck on seventeen
This is the nearest point with Turkey I have ever known
I can't win with Turkey on my own
And now I know that these two things are linked for sure
Playing with the yellow bits
And settling for a draw
And settling for a draw
And settling for a draw
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