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Song Parodies -> "Epilepsy"

Original Song Title:

"Tipsy"

Original Performer:

J-Kwon

Parody Song Title:

"Epilepsy"

The Lyrics

My mother always comments how the flashing strobe lights in dance clubs would effect epileptics. This got me wondering, what if everybody in the club had epilepsy and the resulting group convulsions became a trendy new dance?
[spoken]
Convulsing is very bad.
When you twist and shake like me, yo.
Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! No!
Epilepsy, epilepsy.

Stunned. Swear as your two buckled knees hit the floor.
Then your body funks out like a bandsaw.
Crazy whirling jiggles, writhing contours.
Might be a boogie or some quaint new Terpsichore.
Maybe cuz you heard that it's Carpet Court.
Or maybe cuz you heard it's a great way to score.
Trodden on ten times, you now wriggle in your gore.
You thrust, trying to move towards the ex't door.

Here come more people who do what you've done.
Homies tripping up, don't know how not to run.
Piling right on top, man, these dudes weigh a tonne.
All faint- start to wriggle like pleasured nuns.
Now like an attack every man is now stunned.
Guys are going down and shaking hands- mind the pun.
Half choking on tongues, spraying crap out their lungs.
This friggin whole crowd loves grounded fun.

Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.

Ooh, here come police with this gear to revive.
How they hooking up forty five of these guys?
Couples shaking past, crowd is surfing as they writhe.
Piled convulsing men like an NHL fight.
Ready for the twist? Well those cops join the pile.
Stiffer than a nun's Temptation Isle.
We rhumba and we shake from them flashing lights.
It's a craze now and I've got the copyrights.

Club 54 I'm emcee in my booth.
The whole ceiling has monster lights across the roof.
Want 'em super big so their blinking is huge.
And installed so damn bright they'll impede views.
Your eyes start jiggling, your dance changes moves.
Succussion in the place as these peeps find their groove.
Hey! This party is not vertical, goof.
So go down in twos, sluts, and let's all shudder too.

Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.

Gee, now we're on tour from Hawaii to Minsk.
Health aint mandatory, just faint after the light blinks.
Swiss wriggle, France faints, to the Finnish.
Niger shakes it and Oman stuns like a fish.
Rushed them all off, now the hospital's rich .
Seizures from grunge tunes, make this Burns Ward twitch.
Whole world dropping from this flashing oh-so quick.
Strobing through the night bright, blaring your optics.
No-one's alive on the floor Christmas Eve.
Dancers all dead, cataracts, mothers grieve.
Guess it's a lesson, stop LCDs.
Or just don't dance with your epilepsy!

Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.

Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Now everybody in here's got epilepsy.
Everybody in here's got epilepsy.


Shake it like a polaroid picture.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 19

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   2
 2
 1
 
 5   16
 15
 16
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Ashkicksass - October 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Love the original, love this!
Know 1 can hear you dream - October 25, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS but this reminded me of one of my favorite stand up comedy jokes. (I don't remember where I heard it first and the following is a free translation from Swedish, though that's no guarantee that it's origin is). "I made love to a beautiful woman the other night, it was amazing, she really made me feel like a great lover when she had an orgasm that lasted for 10 minutes. yes, MINUTES!... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... the next morning she told me she had epilepsy!
John Barry - October 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Clever, orginal concept; incisive comment on the foolishness of fads.
Airfarcewon - October 25, 2004 - Report this comment
A most imaginative theme...vividly descriptive
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Thankyou all.
KNOW 1 CAN HEAR YOU DREAM: LOL! You might start a new trend in porno films!
Man, that handicam footage sure is amateur.
No, dude, it's just the latest Debbie Does Epilepsy.
Stuart McArthur - October 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Luke, by nationality you would know Steady Eddie - when he won a dance contest he told the judges "But I was just walking over to the bar for a drink" - a new dance based on chaos theory - great concept - 555
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Sorry Stuart, never heard of Steady Eddie. I'm only 17, was he around before my time or I am I missing out on a great comedian?
Stuart McArthur - October 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Both the above, Luke. He made a stand-up routine based on his cerebral palsy and was everywhere here for a while. Audiences patronised him a bit but his lines were funny. 17?? You write some clever stuff for 17
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - October 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Sounds great, a bit like Jimmy from South Park. "Wow! What a g-g-great audience." You want clever youth? Check out my ex-cyberfiancee here; her stuff was all at 15. http://www.amiright.com/parody/authors/emiloca.shtml

Huh? Cyberfiancee? Check out here:
http://www.amiright.com/parody/2000s/ rickymartin14.shtml
Adagio - November 04, 2004 - Report this comment
SOTM DKTOS Good read
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - November 04, 2004 - Report this comment
Here's a site with loads of midis so you can hum along:
http:// www.starlightmks.com/music/midi/
Scroll down to 'Tipsy'.
Guy - November 09, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Sorry DKTOS. Enjoyed the read just the same.
Ash - November 09, 2004 - Report this comment
SOTM... unfortunately I once again, DKTOS... someone hit me already,...
Rick D - November 11, 2004 - Report this comment
DKOS, but well done.
Agrimorfee - November 12, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, Luke. Very different (and sick) idea--I have no qualms about that, but it seems to go a long way beyond the point of comphrensibility.
Melhi - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, but I'm pretty sure you just predicted the next fad!
Claude Prez - November 19, 2004 - Report this comment
Tried to play the midi but the link didn't work. Still, great concept and if I know you, some extremely clever matches to the original. Very good, I'm sure of it.
Arwen - November 20, 2004 - Report this comment
SOTM--Luke...you and I need to talk about original song choices. I really want to vote on your work one of these days...=(
Stuart McArthur - November 23, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) You're such a clever bloke Luke - I always get a laugh - and still try to check out Steady Eddie - word is he's on the short list for a season at the Rooty Hill RSL soon
martha - November 23, 2004 - Report this comment
this is a wacky tour de force!!! very weird! but so imaginative as the others said..
Johnny D - November 25, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Cleverly YIKES-worthy!
Peregrin - November 26, 2004 - Report this comment
"Dancers all dead, cataracts, mothers grieve"... Well your mother did warn them hey? 5's!

Stuart? Rooty Hill? ;-0
Stuart McArthur - November 26, 2004 - Report this comment
LMAO Peregrin!!! - of all the people to read that comment!

Rooty Hill is actually a very prominent suburb in Sydney, to the mirth of all Australians (duh...ROOTY!!! snigger snigger)
- and they have their very own famous RSL (Returned Servicemens' League) Club, which tend to be the social epicentre of those middle Aussie Sydney suburbs, and without which Gary Glitter, David Cassidy, Dr Hook, etc. would have disappeared totally from the music scene decades ago....
Dee Range - November 27, 2004 - Report this comment
DNKOS...SOTM....great visual images :-)
Spaff.com - November 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Fave bits: "pleasured nuns" and, of course, "mind the pun." I had to stuff my wallet in my mouth while reading this.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - November 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks Guy, Ash, Rick D, Agrimorfee, Melhi, Claude, Arwen, Stuart, Martha, Johnny D, Peregrin, Stuart (again) and Dee Range.
Spaff: I've heard of chewing up your finances, but stuffing a wallet in your mouth? I s'pose it tastes better than swallowing your tongue...
John Jenkins - November 29, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but clever hypothesis and excellent rhyming.
2nz - November 29, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, strong visuals though. Watch them anime trailers too, they can be murder.
Meriadoc - November 30, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, but it seems to be up to your usual excellent standard! :-)
Paul Robinson - November 30, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) DKTOS, wonderful read, though.
Jeff Reuben - December 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Again what Paul said
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - December 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks again guys. I just realise I should have used the 'put yer money where yer mouth is' pun for Spaff's comment. Curses!
Charlie Decker - May 09, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) As often, I hate the OS, but as always, I won't hold it against you. Well done, Luke!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - May 10, 2005 - Report this comment
http://www.suburbanhomeboy.com/admin/files/T--ties (clean).mp3
Rick D - May 10, 2005 - Report this comment
Extra points for vividness
MysteryGoat - May 12, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) DKTOS
Guy - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-E) See above comments. Still DKTOS.
Johnny D - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above
Scathe - May 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-E) I'm sorry, but I don't think epilepsy is funny.
Stuart McArthur - May 14, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) - already commented, three times in fact! - pleasured nuns, nun's Temptation Isle - you're 17 - how big a part (smirk) do nuns play in your fantasies exactly Luke?
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - May 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Nun at all.
http://www.amiright.com/parody/2000s/linkinpark226.shtml
Stuart McArthur - May 15, 2005 - Report this comment
how many nuns does it take to change a lightbulb?
nun
2nz - May 15, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm still a bum, meaning I still DKTOS. I'm not sure I like what you've painted here Luke, but I like how you've painted it.
Jeff Reuben - May 22, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC--I think 2nz and I have the same CD collection, DKTOS. But funny!
Phil Alexander - May 22, 2005 - Report this comment
:-)

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