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Song Parodies -> "Horror Franchise 05"

Original Song Title:

"Jesus Of Suburbia"

Original Performer:

Green Day

Parody Song Title:

"Horror Franchise 05"

Parody Written by:

Josh Bain

The Lyrics

A review of all the wonderfully original horror films from last year.
Part I: Saw II (Jesus of Suburbia)

I'm a man who shows no love.
The Jigsaw Killer I've been dubbed.
It's the shedding of all the victim's blood,
that make's me happy to think of:
Deadly traps and riddling.
Satan's slowly counting my sins in Hell.
He bids a toast farewell,
to the kills I've gotten away with.

Chorus: And there's something wrong with me.
I'm despised like a disease.
I'll not stand for those who need,
to live unhappily.

Some people may say I'm sick.
But I took care of them real quick.
Sent them to doom,
in a private room.
Chained them to the walls so that they-y-y-y-y:
can saw off their leg and escape,
out to a world that's filled with hate,
and so much pain.
It drives me insane,
'cuz there's Germans just like Josh Bain.


Part II: Land of the Dead (City of the Damned)

At the center of the Earth in the parking lot,
there's a hoarde of zombies looking angry and hot.
They wanna eat us ali-i-i-i-i-ive.
I said Romero's latest thriller is such a shame.
Just like the previous three it's quite the same.
It's getting old with time.

Chorus: City of the dead.
Blood is splattered all over the highway.
Zombies always seem to stare.
City of the damned.
Dead people are starting to get smarter.
No one really seems to care.

I grabbed the shotgun on my bedroom wall,
and I shot the zombies in the head so they'd fall,
And they all made such a mess.
I can't say much so I'll only confirm,
that Romero's latest film is such a burn.
It's clear that DAWN is his best.


Part III: The Ring II (I Don't Care)

They don't care if you're not,
They don't care if you're not,
They don't care if you're not scared.
(Repeat 3x)
I'm not scare-e-e-e-e-e-ed.

This movie's so full of s***.
It was made by idiots.
They recycled parts from The Ring,
just so they could get more bling.
We are the kids of Hollywood,
filming remakes that aren't so good.
We all are heading down the road of:
The corrupted Hollywood.
Land of bad movies, lacking originality (Repeat)
So we're not scared.
We're not scared.
We're not scared.

Part IV: White Noise (Dearly Beloved)

Dearly beloved are you listening?
This is your wife who has just died so suddenly.
Am I hearing things or am I disturbed?
Ghosts speaking from beyond,
sounds lame and so absurd.

Oh Dr. Venkman can you fill the void?
Just like The Frighteners,
this film leaves me so annoyed.
This film's not perfect,
it seems so confused.
Just like The Sixth Sense,
it's plot has now been re-used.

Part V: The Amityville Horror (Tales of Another Broken Home)

Remake an old movie.
It leads to tradgedy.
So run, just run away.
To hide from bad movies.

And I leave behind,
this house of secrets and of lies.
A guy who's drank some Gin,
takes guns and shoots his kin.
So we run, we run away,
from this house of masochists.

And I leave behind,
George Lutz's hoak of f*****g lies.
And I loathe this guy,
who's told the media his lies.
He's not worth time.

I now feel so ashamed.
I can't apologize.
This movie's starting to blow.
It's driving me insane.
I've now been victimized.
Horror films are so over.......
I'm leaving.
I'm leaving.
I'm going home.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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 3   1
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Dax - September 28, 2006 - Report this comment
Couldn't have said it (wrote it?) better myself. Great work. Also, I want to take a bath with Naomi Watts.

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