Who took the scissors
You took the scissors
I have lost my scissors
Give em' back

Where have all, the scissors gone
And nineteen staplers are missing to
All of the pencils gone
and the sticky notes 'cept one
Someone is stealing office supplies

Where has all, the paper gone
Someone nicked the photocopier too
And the chair where the boss slept
Best worker certificates
All of this stealings worse, than I assumed

How can I post, any to do lists
The noticeboards gone, Ridiculous
This keeps up then I'll be fired
Then how will I support my wife

You will never believe what I found
A little smuggler by the gate
With my computer
Right up his jumper
That little smuggler by the gate

Now what can I use to analyze

He was one of my workers, yes that thieving little rat
I'll see him when he comes to work at eight
I'll fire his ass

Who's stealing form the cafeteria
The fairy cakes I baked are all gone
All of the Coke and the Pepsi's gone
So why is everybody stealing stuff

You will never believe what I found
A little smuggler by the gate
With my computer
Right up his jumper
That little smuggler by the gate

Why does everybody steal
All the office supplies

Look in my eye and tell me that
You haven't taken things