You cuss me out the whole time
It is like a constant bad mood
Your menstruation has made you hostile
Then at me you chuck a shoe
For your frustration you might need some Midol

Once a month you freak and beat me
And then your shrieks of angst will debut

You’re the crazed one, duck and cover
You then call me a “Stinkin’ Bastard!”
I wish you were more polite it goes bad to worse
Please control your clitorious it is like a curse

It happens all the damn time
You cry, and laugh, giggle and brood
You like castration and this Dame needs Midol
Please stop being so rude
Because this chick is so vile!

You say that I’m a lame creep, a weakling
Then you start to weep, I’m confused

You’re my wife, hun
(I must stay drunk) Can’t be sober
When you’re this way I’m a puny coward
Why can’t we all play nice (Why can’t we all play nice) now I need a nurse
You’re gathering such violence, I’ll soon be dead…

Whoo!
This is not fun, hockey player
Knocked my teeth out I’ll need dentures
No…

Groan…

Put down that gun
Crazy nutter!

Food I must gum, Mixed in blenders
It’s not repaired by cards or flowers
I wish you were a dyke that might sound perverse
But then I could end this torment, not hit with a purse
Now I’m done…