So lately, been wondering
How come my voice is so damn low
I'm only, 23, but now I'm sounding kind of old
They say I sound just like my uncle, whos in his mid-eighties
He's smoke since he was just 12, and now has a throat disease

If I could, then I would
Id learn to sing just like Will Young
Way up high, not down low
But would that help me with this song?

And maybe, I'll find out
A way to reach those higher notes
Breathe hard on, helium
Or punch me in my private place
Cause even in my sleep, I snore so rather deep
I impersonate a fog horn yeah
Stopping me from sleeping

If I could, then I would
Id learn to sing just like Will Young
Way up high, not down low
But would that help me with this song

Kareoke cracks them up
Restricted to singing soul
Cheering girls want my lungs...

I know now, just quite how
I can make this a winning gift
Its was hard, it's alright
I'll sing tributes to Barry White

If I could, then I would
Id learn to sing just like Will Young
Way up high not down low
But would that help me with this song

If I could tune that mic
I'll higher the pinch in my tone
Or I'd become a mime
Just so I won't sound this low
This voice has got to go....