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Song Parodies -> "Don't Phunk With the Chart"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Phunk With My Heart"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Black Eyed Peas

Parody Song Title:

"Don't Phunk With the Chart"

Parody Written by:

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The Lyrics

A man gets a job at a cubicle-era office building which he soon finds is governed by a single graph on the wall that the employees worship like a god. The second paragraph is just a skit and only syncs up with an empty spot in the song so don't get lost. Enjoy!
Oh, no, no, no,
Don't phunk with the chart,

(Welcome to the company. That is your cubicle over there, that's the restroom, and thatthat is the chart! The graph that governs our very existence. We work until our brains rot to improve the numbers on that graph!,
Umthat data doesn't look entirely accurate),

Oh, no, no, no,
Don't phunk with the chart,
You wonder if the bar goes down, will the comp'ny still run, baby?
(Still run, baby),
You wonder if the percentage shown, is a sample from yesterday,
(From yesterday),

It says you're low on money, money,
But it seems so funny, funny,
That the stock price's running,
With no signs of it slowing,
You shouldn't have to work so hard for it,
You should best press on and ignore it,
It looks like you'd be perfect without it,
(Won't fool me),
Let's forget all about it,

Oh, no, no, no,
Don't phunk with the chart,

Guys, come on, I'll even the score,
I've never seen stuff like this before,
I'll bring you much comfort,
Not being ruled by some dumb ch'rt,
Workers should not lose their minds to,
A piece of paper stuck together with glue,
Charts help, they're intended to,
But you can't let the chart ride on you,

(Come on),
You just don't seem to understand,
That the chart is divine, baby,
(Divine, baby),
You just don't seem to understand,
That we worship the bars "n lines,
(The bars "n lines),
Oh no, no, no,
Don't phunk with the chart,

The bathroom's nice and the perks amaze me,
But I can't work if everyone's crazy,
I'm not asking for you to be lazy,
But that depends on how much he pays me,
If you work, then I will work, too,
But I'm not submitting to the paper idol like you,
Crazy is what crazy do,
I think the days of the chart are through,

Oh no, no, no,
Don't phunk with the chart,

Why you so insecure,
About the numbers up there?
Do you even know what they mean?
Do you know the purpose of the lean?
Or is it just a motivation being?
For all employees to be seeing?
Freedom is what I bring,
To take you away from that awful thing,
(Uhyeahcheck it out),

Can't you see what I'm seeing, baby,
That the chart has got you by a string, baby,
Can't you see what I'm seeing, baby,
That the chart has got you by a string, baby,

The people here can't change their clothes,
Because they never leave for homes,
Because they're trying to improve those,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, lines,
Oh, no, no, no,
Don't phunk with the chart!

You wonder if we took it down,
Would the people still live, maybe?
(Still live, maybe),
You wonder if we end it's crown,
Would the world still spin, maybe?
(Still spin, maybe),
You say that if we trash the graph,
We won't be consumed by flames, baby,
(By flames, baby),
But what you just don't understand,
Is the chart graph's true meaning,
(Graph's true meaning),

Can't you see what I'm seeing, baby,
That the chart has got you by a string, baby,
Can't you see what I'm seeing, baby,
That the chart has got you by a string, baby.
I've recorded my part of this and I'm trying to get someone else to record the other part.

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Michael Pacholek - August 26, 2005 - Report this comment
On our chart, this is Number 5 with a bullet. (Wish I'd thought of that line when I read Rick Duncan's hilarious "You Really Shot Me.")

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