Need more friends with drinks
All the drunks that I know
Have bullshit for their brains
I'd always walk home alone
Drunk and kinda lifeless
And sometimes even stoned

There's not enough booze
When everyone knows your name
There's not enough beer
Cause the bartender's a queer

Never played drinking games
I'd have to check my mirror
To see if I look the same
The ladies had no clue
That I drank all my booze
Alone in their bathroom

There's not enough booze
When everyone knows your name
There's not enough beer
Cause the bartender's a queer
There's not enough booze
My bar tab will explain
There's not another bar
And I can't drive my car

Teach us that it's just a phase
When I leave the bar
Other drunks will do the same
Kids just love to tease
They called me Barney Gumble
And rolled me down the street

There's not enough booze
When everyone knows your name
There's not enough beer
Cause the bartender's a queer
There's not enough booze
My bar tab will explain
There's not another bar
And I can't drive my car
There's not enough booze
When everyone knows your name
There's not enough beer
Cause the bartender's a queer
There's not enough booze
And I just kissed a deer