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Song Parodies -> "Swollen"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

Alicia Keys

Parody Song Title:


The Lyrics

Springtime allergies really take that... something... out of your step.
My cheeks are swollen, skin puffing up huge!
Where's my damn puffer? Sunshine oft makes me ooze!
Spring time means more snot, must buy more tissues!
Inflaming now and swelling, my throat feels like a noose!

I weep from pollen... spring is out!
I need drugs... for my throat.
Allergic... to the sun!
I hate my... blocked nose.


Covered in welts all day.
How can I have outdoor leisure? It gives me the plague!
And these hives keep breaking out, oh so cruel...
My skin crawls like wax, oh I've got the flu!

I weep from pollen... and those flowers!
I need drugs... for my skin.
Allergic... to the sun!
I have hive... chagrin.


Swollen! (Crawlin'!)
Swollen! (Revoltin'!)
Swollen! (Gallin'!)
Swollen! (Colon?)

I weep from pollen... major ouch!
I need drugs... for my sores.
Allergic... to the sun!
All day I... sit indoors.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Larry Hensley - August 30, 2005 - Report this comment
I was laughing through this one. 5's
carol - August 30, 2005 - Report this comment
Ouch! this one's good 5's
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Larry and carol!
Yet Another Dutchman - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
You speak true. I can identify with this very much. Heh, heh, there's a flaw in your parody structure, though, I believe. I happened to swipe the lyrics to TOS when it was playing yesterday night on the radio, and near the end I believe it says "fall, fall, fall, fall" "instead of fallin', fallin' et cetera, with the stretch of "fall" into "fa-ha-ha-ha-halll..." Never mind, this was amusing.
Arwen - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Nice work, Mr. Brattoni...=) I don't suffer from allergies myself, so I can't relate...but this still made me smile...=)
Michael Pacholek - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Keep writing parodies like this, and we'll keep giving you swollen scores, and you'll get a swelled head.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - August 31, 2005 - Report this comment
Order of the Kleenex for Yet Another Dutchman, Arwen and Michael Pacholek. I'm one of the lucky ones who sits in class utterly unaffected by the hoardes of bloated, wheezing students sniffing their way through second semester. But when I get a nosebleed from the heat... hoo boy, at least 40 minutes of cold water required.

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