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Song Parodies -> "The Catholic Song"

Original Song Title:

"The Channukah Song"

Original Performer:

Adam Sandler

Parody Song Title:

"The Catholic Song"

Parody Written by:

Jammin' Jeff

The Lyrics

This is a song to all the people who are Catholic, like myself...It includes a bunch of famous people who are Catholic......I hope you like it......If you do...Then get ready for The Catholic Song Pt. 2--Coming Soon!
Ain't it fantastic,
To be a Catholic,
You feel so symbolic,
When you're a Catholic.

Catholicism is a really nice religion,
With events like Confirmation instead of circumcision.
But if you're Catholic and think you're not special,
Or you don't belong,
Then listen to this list of famous people who are Catholic,
Mentioned in this song!

Robert DeNiro, knows what Catholicism's about,
So does Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra, and Gwen Stefani from No Doubt.
During Communion guess who eats the bread and drinks the wine,
None other than Tommy Hilfiger and Kevin Kline.

Regis Philbin's Catholic,
And that's my final answer.
And Brendan Fraser's a great Catholic,
But recently not a great actor.

We've got Peter Criss from KISS,
The Gallagher brothers from Oasis,
The guy who created "Schindler's List",
And Haley Joel Osment,

So if things get chaotic,
Just remember you're a Catholic,
Along with John Cusack and Salma Hayek-olic,
And Lucy Lawless-olic.

Osama Bin Laden,
Not a Catholic,
But Kathie Lee Gifford is,
Except she's so damn dramatic!

Eddie Van Halen is along with brother Alex,
And we also have "7th Heaven" star Catherine Hicks.
Also Alfred Hitchcock and Kid Rock but not Ringo Starr,
However the other Beatles--John, Paul, & George are.

You don't need to spin dreidels or wear a yarmulke,
Instead you could have Communion with Madonna!

So tell you're friend Patrick,
He's cool cause he's Catholic,
Drink up your gin and tonic,
Just don't be an alcoholic,
From The Pacific to Atlant-olic,
People scream and shout-olic,
Because it's really, really, really, really, really, really,
COOL TO BE A CATHOLIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amen Everybody! Goodnight!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.2
How Funny: 3.7
Overall Rating: 3.6

Total Votes: 43

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   10
 2   5
 3   6
 4   9
 5   13

User Comments

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cygna vamp - March 31, 2003 - Report this comment
Pretty funny! The rhymes are a bit sloppy, but so where the rhymes in the orriginal. Also, John Lennon was more of a Freethinker. (This guy wrote "Imagine", a song that infuriated many religeous people.) And I'm pretty sure Spielburg is Jewish.
Marcrates - June 13, 2003 - Report this comment
Great Parody, I enjoyed it. I think there should be a few more versions of this just as it is with the "The Channukah Song" Just for the record, I believe John, Paul, and George met for the first time at a Catholic Church, whether or not John was a Catholic later in life, I'm pretty sure he was one for a while.
Michael Pacholek - June 13, 2003 - Report this comment
John and Paul met at such a church, but Paul already knew George, and introduced him to John on a bus a few months later. They met Ringo at around that time (1957-58), but he didn't join the band until much later (summer '62). And while they didn't exactly stay Catholic, they were all Irish, keeping in mind Ringo's real name is Starkey. As for John's faith, or lack thereof, he said, "IMAGINE there's no Heaven." As in, "WHAT IF if there isn't any?" He made a point of saying, "I don't believe in Jesus," but as far as I know, he never said there was no God. Of course, if he were truly Catholic, he might have said, "There is no God, and Mary is His Mother." (Old joke.) And communion with Madonna? Oy vey. What the heck, today's Friday (the 13th, no less), and I've already eaten meat. You see, there's a Methodism to my madness. Or am I just a Method actor? Father Charlie, I coulda had class, I coulda been a contenduh...
Malcolm - March 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Oskar Schindler, the guy who created the "List", is Catholic. He was probably referring to him, not Spielberg.
tera lavigne - March 23, 2004 - Report this comment
This is a pretty funny song, but i dont think that Kathie Lee Gifford is a catholic (i think she's protestant). Some other catholic favorites of mine are: Grace kelly, Vivien leigh (both deceased), nicole kidman, christina aguilera, catherine deneuve, conan o'brien, mel gibson. The royal families of Monaco, Spain, Luxembourg, and Belgium are all catholic.
rhonda - August 03, 2004 - Report this comment
i thought it was pretty good . i didn't think of so many people in show biz as being Catholic. I am Catholic and glad of it !
*gem* - December 21, 2005 - Report this comment
Very funny! stuck closely with the original, but Speilburg is Jewish, not quite sure where you got that from. Anyway, it was still good, it made me laugh as hard as the original. IT'S GOOD TO BE A CATHOLIC!
Adagio - December 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Really good song!! I'm glad that you have a pt. 2. coming up. Yes, it's very good to be Catholic!! Glad that I am! 5's
Julie - December 04, 2007 - Report this comment
Just a note: Madonna is very NOT catholic. She practices Kabbah pretty hard core. And Calvin Klien is mentioned in the Channukah song. Fix you song
jen - June 16, 2008 - Report this comment
that song sucks
lilCatLicker - June 16, 2008 - Report this comment
Great funny piece here, Sir. I never knew that such a parody/poem existed!! All of ~ Milwaukee,WI ~ thanks you, Sir. Can we add Jackie Gleason & Ernest Hemingway to the list ?
Matthew - June 22, 2008 - Report this comment
How do i listen to this song?

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