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Song Parodies -> "Cowboy Diplomat"

Original Song Title:

"When I’m Gone"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

3 Doors Down

Parody Song Title:

"Cowboy Diplomat"

Parody Written by:

Hu’s On First

The Lyrics

I first came up with this idea back during the Bush administration but never finished it at the time. It ended up being about a hypothetical president who has all the worst qualities of Bush and Trump combined. In other words, he’s so upset about Mexico and other countries sending us their “bad hombres” that he threatens to invade.
There’s a scary world that’s south of here
That’s filling us with fear
As the president, it’s my job to decide
They’re sending us their darkness
With their violence and crime
The caravan is on the way
I say that it’s time
I say that it’s time

Well I’m not laying down
I don’t play like that
I’ll stand up and fight
A cowboy diplomat
If you’re not with us
Then you’re the enemy
It’s time for you to choose
Which one you wanna be
Don’t send your rapists here
Or smuggle in your drugs
I’ll send in all our troops
And squash you all like bugs
‘Cause I’m not laying down
I don’t play like that
I’ll stand up and fight
‘Cause might always makes right
A cowboy diplomat

Well those educated liberals
And the liars in the press
They can’t tell me a damn thing
That would make me second-guess
We’ll make the US great again
By conquering more land
This is not my Alamo
And this ain’t Custer’s stand

‘Cause I’m not laying down
I don’t play like that
I’ll stand up and fight
A cowboy diplomat
If you’re not with us
Then you’re the enemy
It’s time for you to choose
Which one you wanna be
Don’t send your rapists here
Your bandits and your thugs
I’ll send in all our troops
And squash you all like bugs
‘Cause I’m not laying down
I don’t play like that
I’ll stand up and fight
‘Cause might always makes right
A cowboy diplomat

Well I say that it’s time

Well I’m not laying down
I don’t play like that
I’ll stand up and fight
A cowboy diplomat
If you’re not with us
Then you’re the enemy
It’s time for you to choose
Which one you wanna be
Don’t send your rapists here
Or smuggle in your drugs
I’ll send in all our troops
And squash you all like bugs
‘Cause I’m not laying down
I don’t play like that
I’ll stand up and fight
‘Cause might always makes right
A cowboy diplomat

Cowboy diplomat
Cowboy diplomat
Diplomat

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