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Music Jokes -> The Beatles

Jokes about The Beatles from the largest music humor site on the web. Check out the index for other performers we have jokes about.


Help! [UK] album at Amazon.com

How can you tell if you have an authentic Beatles shirt? When it has a Ringo round the collar!

- Submitted by: david sowards

Heard about the new Beatles album? They've gone all Drum 'n' Bass...

I really hope The Beatles don't try and reunite like all these other veteran rock bands... They'd only be half the band they used to be!

- Submitted by: Robert D. Arndt Jr.

It must be lonely for Ringo being the only original Beatle alive.
.....First it was Paul then John and now George.

It seems as though the Beatles are dying in the wrong order.

- Submitted by: GeorgeW

King John and King George ruled England, King Paul ruled Greece, And King Ringo ruled the Drums!

- Submitted by: Megan

One good thing about Lennon not reaching old age; he didn't become old, withered, and wrinkly like McCartney.

- Submitted by: BeatlesFan9

Paul: Why don't you just quit and live in an "Cctupus's Garden", Ringo? John: Yeah! And take you're "Yellow Submarine" with you! George: "Boys", let's say "Good Night" and leave him to pack his things! Ringo: Sure, but I'll only do it "With a Little Help From My Friends"... (Don't worry, I LOVE Ringo!)

- Submitted by: beatlesfan99

Q: Did you hear about the Beatles re-union tour?
A: The shows were good but there was no John

Q: There was a ghost a talented guy from the band the beatles and an old lady. There was also a penny in the middle of the road. Who got the penny first? A:The old lady.Because a ghost doesnt exist and neither does a talented guy from the band the beatles!

- Submitted by: Elly

Q: What does Yoko Ono and Ethiopians have in common? A: They both live off of dead Beatles!

Q: What were the worst words ever said in rock and roll?
A: How about we let Ringo sing one.

- Submitted by: Steve

Q: What would be necessary to reunite the Beatles?
A: A gun and two bullets

Q: Which Beatle had the biggest penis?
A: Best, Peter

Teacher: Use "Beetles" in a sentence. Student: "By George," said Paul. "John's lost his Ringo."

- Submitted by: Silly Steve

What did George Harrison say to his guitar while it gently weeped?
Don't Fret.

- Submitted by: Johnny Rabon

When did Paul McCartney write 'Silly Love Songs'
A. 1962-2005

Why was it so quiet at Beatles concerts?
Because they played like crickets.

- Submitted by: Renee Sutton

With all the drug use going on in the 60's, it's a wonder none of The Beatles were found lying dead in bed. Unless, of course, you count the flowerbed in front of the Dakota.

- Submitted by: Anonymous
 
 

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